My Short Stories
Enjoy my flash stories. Please select by category ...
The Canton Lead
Two men and a woman had me pinned to the ground. The woman had a pair of shears. She roughly turned my head and cut off my queue, holding it aloft, a growl of triumph as she brandished my hair for the mob. I struggled, a leg free, finding a groin, hearing a grunt, and…
Balang’s instruction
This is Dungbon country, about 80 kilometres south of Maningrida, Central Arnhem land. I am sitting with my ngadjadj. You call him my mother’s brother, my uncle. We are on a ledge; high and shaded, a commanding position with the soft early morning light casting deep shadows across the valley below. Over the past few…
Skinning the cat
I’m not going to let this develop into a row, but … I mean, we’ve taken the long drive down to her place every year since the kids were little. I know Margaret’s getting on, but she talks incessantly and blathers about the doings of her neighbours and distant relatives: I’ve never met most of…
A contracted trip
It’s six in the evening and a westward sky has that slightly indefinable band of Paines Grey washing up against the burnished, retreating sun. At thirty-eight thousand feet, I stare out at the nothingness, the steady, low-pitched hum of engines felt, maybe just imagined, comfortably reassuring, somewhere behind. The flight is interminable, a generous scotch,…
A policy wonk’s morning
You sense that today will be the start of something different. The signs look good – no burnt toast, your new coffee beans deliver a delicious complexity, and your decision to iron your underpants and shirt last night means arrival at the bus station just as your bus arrives. Your favourite upstairs seat is vacant!…
Screentime
Why do I venture out on such a miserable, Melbourne winter’s day? The simple truth is that I miss the smells, the hubbub and the clamour of the South Melbourne market. It’s been three years since I moved away, but I still journey to Coventry Street when possible. My tram interchange means a brief exposure…
An old letter resurfaces
Old books are as good as old friends, and second-hand bookshops are my go-to when the weather is lousy. I am meeting friends in Castlemaine; I’m very early. Yet again I pass that bookshop in Campbell’s Creek, the one I have been passing for years, always promising to pop in, one day. Today’s the day.…
The north wind
Summer heat, the bedroom air conditioning system is going flat out against the Bureau’s advice that it is unlikely to drop below 25 degrees overnight. At 8 pm it’s still 35. The north wind is bringing Central Australia to town. Even the vegetable patch is withdrawn, wilting to preserve some hydration. Our breeding program is…
Claude and I
It’s strange how quickly some relationships develop. Claude and I had only met about three weeks ago. He was scurrying across the workshop, carrying some edible titbits: he later explained – the ‘elevenses’ for the crew. And me? Well I was a recent transferee from another part of the factory, an involuntary refugee, moved as…
A gardening soliloquy
John corners me as I come into the kitchen this morning. “Here’s your long black. Are you OK if we revisit the garden redevelopment ideas?” This was the third time he raised it this week, and to be honest, his OCD was starting to wear thin! We were planning a vegetable patch, but his military…
Svelte Claude flies
How often do you see a sign advertising Cockroach racing? I reread the aging, fly-spotted notice. Half of it is missing but still advises ‘Thoroughbred Cockroach racing … BYO ‘roaches. $1,000 prize pool. If interested, call this numb…’ It is dark, late Autumn and I’m being kicked out of the Empress of India for pissing…
A mining tale.
Can you imagine a house simply disappearing? One moment it’s there, the next it folds in on itself, like closing one of those kid’s 3D panorama storybooks, concertina-like, and just disappears into a hitherto unknown abyss. Our house slides into an old gold mine! Thank God we’re all at the supermarket. We turn into our…
Tracy and I
I’d just about had enough. We were both working on a remote island north of Darwin, but Tracey had taken a few weeks’ leave; “to get her head straight!” She was now home, things were tense, but there were moments of rekindled joy, intimacies, hopeful signs that we could get on top of ‘things’. Then…
Magpies and fairies
Morning sunshine is sneaking onto the front verandah, erasing memories of recent cold, gloomy days. As is my want at such a time, I’m outside, wrapped warmly and seated, expectant, waiting for the daily Magpie Chorus to start. On queue, they arrive. There’s a bit of jostling; four, five, now six members executing some preliminary…
Fantasy’s freedom
“Next!” That was my dismissal. He’d asked me if I’d ever sung in a choir. I hadn’t and I told him so. “Here endeth the lesson” a phrase that comes to mind in an unguarded moment, when I wander back to that audition, sixty-five years ago. Week three, the school chaplain had one hundred new,…
My dad, and me
Can ya be in love with ya memories? That’s the question swirling around me head, ever since last June’s bust-up with Bruce. He reckons we have ta move closer to town! Can you imagine? Three bedrooms on a quarter acre, lawn mowing, neighbours, traffic and kids hooning around. I betcha the Holden will be stolen…
A cloudy, cold day in July
So who suggests this bloody walk, anyway? The brochure and the hotel concierge both say the trek between Lake Louise across to Lake Agnes is clearly marked, spectacular and takes 5 to 6 hours return. We’ll be at the point where, before global warming, six individual glaciers converge. Late summer, a cloudy, cold day but…
The eyes have it
It’s the yellow eyes my mind returns to. Nightmares feature those unblinking orbs, set high on its head, half a metre back from a snout, above a row of pearly whites. Even after all these years, a shiver works its way up my spine. The family holiday, in Darwin. Someone suggests the visit to Crocodile…
Grandpa’s treasure
He remembers seeing a Thylacine, in the glade, staring. For maybe a minute it lingers before it quietly moves off into the bush. There are other stories. Bullocks crushed when the jinker’s brakes fail; several near misses, as behemoths fall the wrong way, mateship and his lifelong love of the bush. But now, the sandwiches…
Friday’s focus
I had half an eye on the catastrophe unfolding in the Grampians, terrifying images flash across the screen. Rampant flames swallow grasslands, trees and houses, insistent red and blue emergency lights wink furiously. Yellow Hi-Viz bedecked men and women hold hoses, hopeful, but powerless against this de-bottled genie. The Bureau predict the maelstrom; dry summer…
An aged chick, checking out
Things were looking grim. My part-pension and small nest-egg just weren’t covering the ever-increasing cost of the overheads for myself and the five cats. Tears and sleepless nights didn’t help. I needed a job. I had retired from a Nursing Home carer’s role a few years ago. I felt totally lost! Pension Day and I…
A master painter
My mind was buzzing, memories swirling and ideas flying towards a central concept in these few moments after reading the fly leaf of the paperback sent via a friend’s ‘declutter’! Stephen Scheding’s “A small unsigned painting” brought my brother’s email about six months ago rushing, faster than the proverbial ‘cheetah’ back into my consciousness. He…
The three musketeers
It has been a couple of decades, and I was pleasantly surprised at my reaction to the email. He was going to be in Melbourne for a conference. “What about a catch-up?” I am waiting at the terminal. We were the ultimate Three Musketeers, Stephen, Becky and I. We were in Bubs together, throughout Primary…
Tis the season for netting …
“Those bloody rosellas!” The trees are awash with splashes of red, blue and yellow feathers, each gobbling greedily, screeching loudly, confirming to the multitude that the fruit is ripe. I have the broom, waving it manically as I run into the orchard. Frustrated tears fall as I race around, ineffectually shoo-shooing, flapping the broom, yelling…
Gazan intercept
1. Deep dark deeds The dark, uneven floor is littered with what my ears tell me are probably pottery shards. I stub my toe on something and am loathe to move the torch beam far from the floor. There are larger bits of pottery, that for the moment remain unidentifiable. An hour earlier I tied…
That music box
She twirled, her blue tutu flounced, as she pirouetted around her glass floor, the mirror capturing and reflecting the performance to ‘London Bridge is falling down’. It was always a ‘must have’ highlight of our visits to Gran. “She’s an enchantress” Gran used to say, but that was as much information as we ever got.…
Lowness
There is nothing unusual about shadows. They are synonymous with sunlight; dark, two-dimensional splotches duplicating the world about. What’s unusual about the present circumstance is that there is no sunshine. It’s midnight, moonless and I am stumbling along the laneway, making my way homeward after a boozy session at the local. I sense, rather than…
Grandpa’s got fairies
I have my old red and green shirt on and I walk over to Grandpa. “Is it time to do it?” He doesn’t hear me, he’s kneeling down fiddling, using a feather to tickle the flower’s inside. He has told me that it is his secret for growing huge, prize-winning veggies. I try again “Hey,…
We’ve got fairies
“Grandpa, is it time to do it?” I am concentrating on tickling the aubergine’s stigmata and the tiny voice just wasn’t computing! I heard the voice, I momentarily looked up, but, ah, who was this small person in my hothouse? I heard the voice again; I heard and identified an impatient whine. “Grandpa!” “Oh, hello…
Sebastian and I
I can stop over before or after Marseilles. I will miss the funeral regardless of my decision, so I go to Rome first, planning Madrid, with free time, afterwards. Our loving is erotic, comfortable; mostly uninhibited, albeit always within the constraints imposed by an affair. We have been lovers for fifteen years, intermittent, opportunistic, international…
Attention, counters
I do like the roominess of that seat immediately behind the driver, but their head spoils my view. I need to get an uninterrupted vista to ensure I count the mileage posts accurately. Some councils put the distance markers on the left. This means I need a left-hand seat, towards the very front of the…
Pardon?
I was up early, wanting to maximise time in the promised warm, dry weather; to catch up on the weeding around the aubergine, bok choy and kale: she had always loved her Kale! I had been paying the blackbirds with bread, to scrape the weeds, but they were on a ‘go-slow’. I alerted them to…
A voice ne’er forgotten
The portable Olivetti case is battered and scratched. Despite a few decades of dust and grime, I recognise it instantly. I see Mum sitting uncomfortably on an ancient, low stone wall, the typewriter on her knees as she pounds the keys. There are pictures in the family albums of that Olivetti, well-travelled, always in the…
Heads, you lose
Losing my head was an unfortunate mistake. An invitation to attend the Tribunal Revolutionaire, an all-expenses-paid holiday at la Bastille and then away it went – the ‘national razor’ dropped, and that was that! Silly, careless when I stopped to think about it. I know I was outspoken, loud sometimes, just a drunken, forlorn bore,…
The uninvited resident
It took her several weeks to tell me. I think if she had confided her ‘vision’ earlier, maybe at the moment when we were first inspecting the property, I would have resisted purchasing that beautiful old house. Its’ acre sat fronting the little river that wended its way through the village; the water easement…
Three notes – Johanna
Men! Two husbands and a brother-in-law, dead or as good as! And now I am forced, by circumstance, into an industry dominated by self-important misogynists who dismiss me out of hand. It is time for women to stand up, to unite. I have joined the Social Democratic Labour Party, and steer the Women’s sub-committee. It’s…
Three notes – Theo
My earliest memories are of the six of us ice skating on the frozen canals running through the centre of Zundert, close to Father’s church. Vincent is a tentative skater, never keen to race with us, preferring the long straights where he would skate at his own pace. As the light closed in, we knew…
Three notes – Vincent
The sunflowers are intoxicating, growing from here to forever, as far as my eye can see, as I pack my easel, paints and brushes onto the trusty bike, and head back. The evening chill is a reminder that summer is faltering, the laneway leaves will be starting to fall, offering a new palette to consider,…
Protection
A kitchen knife claimed my attention, protruding from below her right breast, its dark handle bloodied but I noticed, curiously, little else on the front of her pyjamas was sullied. I remember the music machine was repetitively playing ‘Hotel California’. I dialled 000 and retreated, dazed, and confused to her front verandah and waited. Sirens…
Tijuana Colitas, anyone?
My new, seventy-something neighbour, Mary Jane, often stands in her doorway, or sometimes she sits on the grass verge, actually just a patch of weeds. She always has a dopey look, apparently focused on the joint across the road, the one with the pot-hole in the driveway. She will sit and stare for hours. I…
Secret bishness
Just like his father, 50 years earlier, he simply walks over the sand dune and vanishes. The search goes on for weeks, unsuccessfully. Uluru is halfway between Alice Springs and home. Toby Tjupurrula and I buy a sandwich at the hotel before travelling another 240kms on the rough sandy track towards Western Australia. The ‘Rock’…
I am really, really scared when …
“I am over on the Island. Are you able to get over here and finish our bishness?” That is the reason for me being in this bloody predicament: a rushing, outgoing tide, our boat stuck on an ever-widening sandbar, and a monster, my nemesis, nearby! I charter Steve and his 17’ Seamaster for the two-hour…
‘Serendipity
Ga-wutj-wutj-ma. That’s his Jawoyn name, Aunty explains. He’s a cheeky little bird, energy levels high, as he flits between an old paperbark tree, leaning precariously out over Katherine’s Low-Level crossing and the thick swathes of Pandanus spiralis, on the far side of the river. The Willie Wagtail lands just above our heads, a small blue-winged…
My viper attack
I was with a group of friends on an outing from our Israeli Kibbutz, Beit Kama. We were walking along narrow stony paths, bordering wheat fields. We had no specific destination, instead, enjoying the sunshine and pursuing an opportunity to get out from under the slightly oppressive blanket of Kibbutzim. I suppose it must have…
Glenelg River trip
We had been planning our visit to the Lower Glenelg National Park for weeks with texts, emails and calls zipping between us. We had two sites booked at the Forest North campsite, and arrived mid-afternoon, keen to settle in, set up camp and relax for the next four days. Tents were efficiently erected, gear unloaded,…
Clancy, the Tom
Clancy, the Tom For want of better knowledge I sprayed Mortein on a fly, Next day I was debating with a passer-by If my action was a slaughter akin to keeping cats as pets And we found ourselves in corners hurling threats. Her defence was unexpected, loudly slating my remark That her nightly pussy’s…
An early exposure
I need to talk with my brother to confirm memories of that long-ago excursion. Could Mum and Dad have actually allowed it? I still have my doubts, have considered the backstory from several angles, trying to make sense of our parent’s decision to let us loose, unescorted into Sydney. It was in 1962. I must…
Avian antics, and a cat.
It’s early, forecast heat still behind the dawn. Daylights’ dissolving darkness. Branches move, as the breeze plays along the street. Tweeting amplifies the quiet, my new day shared. Blackbird’s gardening, raking, stepping back, probing … breakfast. Galahs above, pass noisily. Off somewhere, kookaburras laugh, apparently signalling rain: I wish. Crows share my scepticism as two…
My head and I
Thursday started with a bit of a ‘spin’ in the bedroom, as I swung my legs over the bedside. Opps, mmm dizzy, coffee injecting the necessary stimulus. I went off into the early morning to prune a leaf or four. Home, bed, things worse overnight. Doctor sees me swaying towards his rooms. He grabs me…
Benji liked the window
They had met in Sydney – a glassware trade fair – both wholesale agents. A morning coffee break, pleasantries, small talk, stolen glances, private assessments, later compared. ‘Coincidental’ shared lunchtime seating and a little gentle parrying from both parties. He inquired about her evening’s plans. She broke a dinner engagement, he flicked the pub, and…
Ashley and Taylor’s decline
They had shared the corridors for years. Ashley’s room looked out over the park, while Taylor’s caught quite a lot of morning sunshine. They shared many interests, even shared the shaggy dog that locally ate, wagged, and shat. During the recent Covid, they had taken to walking the pooch on the trail that circled the…
Competition
Every year, as the bleak Ballarat winter started to falter, and with the appearance of the occasional warm, sunny day, my sister and I would start to get a bit antsy with each other. We would avoid gardening talk, and actually, in recent years it got to the stage that we would avoid visiting each…
Weasal words
I was taking time out, kicking back after finally winning the prestigious nature-photographic competition – and a hands down win too, I might add. I was wandering in a hitherto unexplored stretch of forest and suddenly, in this space, there it was, as plain as day! I cannot remember ever seeing a weasel before but…
Ashley and Taylor revisited
The Lockdown was shifting the relationship. Throughout the autumn, and the dank winter months, the couple were housebound. Yep, sure there were the park walks with the pooch, even the weekly, masked drive to Aldi, IGA and the new-found Asian Grocer but further afield was off-limits. Friends were no longer able to pop in for…
Pollyanna’s optimism
Brrrarp – as Polly’s sleepy mind regained consciousness. A cheeky smile followed the emission, and there was a conscious effort to keep the doona tightly scrunched down against the sheet, working against her instinct to roll over, to look at the clock, to stretch. A minute, sometimes two, and then a long, irresistible series of…
Maralinga’s* lament
My Grannie told me about the time the country finished up. That sun came down over the land – the kangaroos, wombats, snakes, flies, crows: just about everything melted. A terrible wind blew, howling like a lonely, sick dingo, sucking life up into a big hole in the sky. The ground melted into a…
I think they were from Jupiters
I almost gave up roulette forever, after losing my shirt, in about thirty minutes, at the Monte Carlo casino. But not quite! In the summer of 1975, $2,500 was a heck of a lot of money for a young divorcee, licking wounded pride in Europe. I had this failsafe system, refined on a toy wheel…
The Rosetta Curse
Academic order was turned on its head, all because somebody found an old stone! You probably thought Egyptologists were above politics, happily translating their hieroglyphics as per the early nineteenth-century Rosetta Stone interpretations. But sadly, no! Although not widely reported, except within archaeological journals, there was the quite serendipitous, 1942 discovery of the missing upper…
Slogans – a reflective journey
“So think about what is most important to you about this community. Put thoughts on the stickies.” I am at the whiteboard, marker pens and yellow stickies distributed to the assembled stakeholders. The Mayor, two other Councillors, Council staff include the CEO, the Business Manager and the Tourist Officer. There were eight other prominent, ‘ordinary’…
Tenterfield reflection
I (together with the UN and Malcolm Turnbull) had birthdays last Sunday, 24th October. I drove through Tenterfield, on my way to the NSW north coast. I belatedly discovered that on that same day, 125 years earlier, Sir Henry Parkes, one-time NSW Premier, delivered what has become known as the Tenterfield Oration, a general ‘call…
Water trading corruption
It has been a long day on the river, too much sun, sore muscles and it was pleasing to have the Amity secure, the fire alight, and the second beer about to be broached. We note another couple, one hundred metres or so downstream, and as the stubby tops are opening, Gail, wielding a plate…
Breaking the drought
I had been chasing their ‘Account’ for months and the call from Scotty, in Marketing suggested I was finally on their radar! He wanted a face to face, to discuss their previous campaigns, targets, budgets, placement mix, and their kpi’s. He was keen to meet, suggesting Friday. I was excited, quietly confident that my longstanding…
Misplaced
“This is silly. We passed that clump of trees on our way to the car. Remember the way that branch, yep, that one on the big old gum over there, on the right, sorta looks like a body, arms outstretched? We commented upon it.” Nancy nodded, and a slight shiver moved down to her hand,…
Seaweed in hand’s worth…
Australia’s American-built, nuclear subs arrived in 2049 and were deployed almost immediately on an extended, secret mission. In fact, they were kept ‘off the surface’ for fifteen months, moving surreptitiously around the Pacific, poking around the kelp forests of the South China Sea, around Hawaii, Japan, New Zealand, looking, sampling, forever on the move. But…
Innamincka and beyond
I am sitting in an Adelaide boardroom listening to colleague, Lisa talk of a forthcoming trip along the Strzelecki and Birdsville Tracks, to Innamincka, Birdsville, Mungeranie and Maree. I have my ears pricked attentively as she talks of her recent appointment as Regional Tourism Manager and of a need to make contact with some of…
Our garden – a passionate subject
Have you ever seen those computer-controlled fountain displays? Jets of water, sometimes illuminated at night, sometimes with a musical accompaniment, erupting and dissipating, children running, squealing, laughing through those summer jets, colour, and form, constantly changing. That’s the effect that we want to create in our new garden – a riotous, seasonally-changing palette of colours.…
The intersection of bad cooking, an argument and a bird’s nest.
The sticky mess flies high, arcing towards the huge gum tree growing off the back deck. ‘Thank goodness that’s gone’, I muse, as I march back inside to resume loud protestations against the efforts of the would-be cook. Twelve eggs, 100 grams of Beluga caviar, a goodly measure of thinly sliced prosciutto, plain flour and…
Insects
“Look at those monsters”, an awe-struck Thomas said. We were lying down on the lawn using the new, hand-held magnifying glass I had bought, looking at what lurked beneath. Thomas saw a small ant busily racing along a pathway. Several more passed, all intent on ‘something ahead’. Thomas suggested that if we could see their…
“Upgrade to first class …!”
I was still trying to figure out why I had cleared customs. Three of the twenty-four flying hours done, twenty-one still ahead of me, and I am wandering through the Duty-Free section of Auckland International. I’ve still to get over the Pacific to Santiago, onwards to Rio, another change then five hours to Fortaleza, in…
Got much on …
I knew it was coming. 4.15, the after-school shift had arrived and were staffing the check-outs. As my frozen beans, yoghurt, fruit, vegetables and tins slid inexorably towards the scanner, it arrived: “Got much on for the rest of the day?” An hour earlier, the phlebotomist had asked me the same question, as she explored…
Three wishes
The beautifully delicate butterfly settled near my left ear. I barely felt her landing but the whispered inducement startled me. She quietly informed me that I had been selected to receive three wishes. Why me, I cynically thought, unquestionably accepting this extraordinary happening! As if whispering butterflies were a ‘dime-a-dozen’, as if an offer of…
“If it hadn’t been for that damn cat …!”
Six pages of ads for Hardly Normal, four from Domayne furnishings, a total of eight offering adventure travel to the wilds of Thai beachside resorts or river cruising between Amsterdam and Vienna, insights into the life and times of some wannabe starlet, upcoming movie reviews, the astrological charts and a ridiculously obscure, giant crossword. There…
Shed treasure
It was a year since we had entered into our first mortgage. It followed finding and falling in love with the old farmhouse, its hundred hectares of grazing land, and four dozen cattle. In preparation for a new family member’s arrival, it was time to tackle the shed, to explore where the sun never shone,…
Flying emergency
One moment Steve and I are discussing the Maningrida meeting, cruising at 5,000’ on our way back to Darwin. Below, are the green watery floodplains bordering the Arafura Sea. Next thing, a thin watery stream of vomit traces down Steve’s shirtfront, he is clutching his chest and slumping sideways across his seat. It all happens…
Me? Eccentric!
I stand on the chair, as Phyllis instructs. She again works the stapler around the drooping hem of my shorts. I wouldn’t have bothered but my PA insists I try and look respectable. I don’t think anybody else sees her flicking my testicles, as her remonstrance against my lack of common decency. Yep, they do…
My Uncle Clive
I used to love crossing the road from our place, my feet scrunching up the long gravel driveway, my focus, the sights and smells of Uncle Clive’s workshop. Shellac, or paint assaulted the nostrils, recently sawn lengths of timber were assembled, a lump of lard on the saw bench, a pile of old rags, furniture…
Canoeing the Goulburn
“Hey look at that” Bill said, indicating a small, swirling spot in the water just ahead of our canoe. My mind’s eye had also registered a little flat-beaked head and beady eyes, momentarily looking at us, as we paddled. “It must have been a fish” Bill conjectured “I don’t think Platypus are active during the…
Junior school at Corio
I was recently complaining to a friend about his freezing bathroom. He talked about the need to ‘toughen up’, and the influence of ‘character-building’ experiences he remembered from years of boarding school’s draughty, winter ablution facilities. I had a rush of memories from the early ’60s about my own experiences as a young boarder at…
A rake, with chips
The €10 chip flew high, glistening in the late afternoon light as it fell. Heads. I took the right fork, Mister Chips snugly, securely back into my pocket. My once pretentious brogues, broken, flapping as the sole and uppers continued their separation, sunk into the muddy track. Mister Chips always made the hard calls, my…
Farewell to Darwin
“Do ya wanna come out sailing wid us tomarraw?” Bill proffered? “Meet yas down at Sadgroves Wharf pontoon at 4.30. Bring some tucker and booze.” For all that, they left me sitting forlornly on the pontoon. I self-consciously hollered, somebody else took up the theme and banged a fuel drum. Attention was achieved, a tender…
Addiction
I stopped smoking last Sunday night, October 8th, 2006 a couple of weeks short of my 57th birthday! I had fallen off the twig last June, eagerly anticipating company at ATE, a little tobacco-laced joint was all that it took to get those warm, fuzzy tobacco thoughts pumping again. So four months on and it…
Cazneaux’s Tree
Lynette and I have been travelling the trade circuit together for years, selling South Australia at shows in London, Berlin, Brisbane, Sydney, New York, Melbourne and Adelaide. Flights, airports and hotels. Lost luggage, set ups, knock downs, smiles and flu. The glamour of travel! We also share a passion for painting; both dabblers with many…
Paperbark wasps
While paper makes up half their name The sting suggests less tamer game Falls prey, this an idle thought, for what I need be giving is a lethal swat! “Just grab the hose and lift it over that shrub, will ya”. At that moment, beachside, at Milikapiti, on Melville Island, all hell breaks loose.…
Diesel fuel and I
A hint of daylight still on the horizon, an evening chill descending, recent drizzle in evidence. My phone rings. “Help! I’m on the side of the freeway – out of fuel!” Diesel, of course, with all the issues that that entails. The good part of this story – he was only about forty minutes away.…
The swill
There would be restrictive outcomes flowing from ‘joining the dots’, and despite several hours spent considering our options, none of them made sense! Church and promised salvation versus a slaked thirst. There would be considerable inconveniences, … and well, bugger it, the arguments went so far up our nostrils that we were finding it difficult…
Pate fluff and fleece …
What exactly are your bi-monthly trips to the hair salon about? Are they insecurities coming to the fore, your fear of aging, of possible relevance deprivation? Are they countering a potential loss of virility, a perceived threat from the young Turks? You walk around the office bleating about grey hair; glancing in mirrors, window glass,…
A shared wok
The radio never worked after alone, one Sunday, I took it apart. I reassembled it, before they returned, but the crackle got worse. “Good evening, this is the ABC News. Darwin has been hit by …”. Dad banged it, giggling and threatening dire retribution, and got “… evacuation will be continuing …” He continued to…
Chocks Away
“Granpa, high-yer, sing high-yer.” Giggling from both me and three-year-old Thomas continued as the old tyre was brought back to deliver an almighty swing. Wheeeee – Thomas’ long golden hair swept back off his face, as the tyre, Thomas and his angelic features flew through the late summer twilight. My memory wandered. Grandpa had bought…
Loosely hanging
Sandy: that’s me. I’m quite down in the dumps, despite it being Tuesday and the day before my psych appointment. Contrary to my usual upbeat self, a depression is descending, unexpected, unanticipated. I have a need to find some higher ground. The lowness is probably explained by a decision to stop taking my meds. It…
Good students survive
It was one of those oft-repeated family stories that just wouldn’t go away. My parents loved me dearly, but did they have to tell the neighbours, repetitiously, at every opportunity? “Moloch is so clever”, “Moloch never misses his classes”, Moloch this, Moloch that, blah. It was an embarrassment and as I got older, I took…
The quiz night
“What can be given to the dying, lives in the sea and/or grows in the desert”, asked the Quizmaster? I saw Jason surreptitiously picking his nose: we all noticed, urgh, wondering how this moron got onto our team! He had BO too, and that shirt, complete with deodorant stains, hadn’t been ironed, either! You’d think…
Marjorie Sweetman’s nectar
“Look, if we follow your suggestion, we’ll be in deep shit. I mean, we can’t just break her arms: what if somebody sees them?” We’d been wrestling with the issue for about forty minutes, and really, we were no closer to a solution. Two issues – Majorie Sweetman had reached PORM (premature-onset rigor mortis), long…
A failed missionary, maybe.
Last week, this huge, pierced septum walked past me as I approached the supermarket. I saw the dreadlocks first, yards of grey, possibly greasy coils, suggesting an older alternative, home-spun- yoghurt sorta guy, not that I generally jump to any nasturtiums. But ya know what I mean, eh? As I parked the car, he walked…
Spooked, was I
I was noticing that the décor in the study was being moved. Pictures were shifting, furniture rearranged, the floor rug had transmogrified from a beautifully salubrious Persian Kashan, to what today could only be described as a Hardly Normal special! I thought it must have been the contract cleaners, taking liberties. My efforts to be…
A second chance
The schedule for clearing out the house had proved a little awkward, squeezed into the school holidays. Nonetheless, I had resigned myself to the task, drawing surprising comfort, a chance to say my own goodbyes. Last month’s funeral, the public sharing and celebration of Mum’s life had been stressful and I was glad for these…
Village Byways
I was in our local library, not quite resigned to accept the threatened onset of relevance deprivation. I had attended a post-retirement workshop, suggestions included dancing, cookery, gardening or a research project. The kitchen provided sustenance, I killed plants and the thought of dancing in the dark filled me with dread. I reckoned a research…
Annus Horribilus
“Wodger, you know, after so many years working on this project, and now to be finally at the pointy end, I actually feel quite deflated. Can you understand that?” “Yer, I can Sheridan. I know what ya mean – beavering away on this inevitability, this financial bonanza just waiting to happen. It must be seven…
Out and about with Alice, and Mum
I remember when I first stepped on them! My foot–faulted. I had aimed for a long step, achieving just three quarters. Reckless behaviour. Mum, and my older sister Alice, had warned me against such loose stepping. My hand went to the bottom of my right pocket, squeezing the bejesus out of my rabbit’s foot. Careful,…
Knobs, men and languages
She’d rarely got in a funk, but when asked to cover the Northern Territory’s Cannonball Run, she was unsure whether to book flights to Canada or Australia. Motor Sports were her journalistic gig, covering some of the biggest races on the international circuits, so WTF was she doing in Darwin, this hot, steamy, godforsaken backwater.…